I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
