i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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