week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize