Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
