It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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