how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
