mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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