Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize