Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize