paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
