i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
