rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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