i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
