i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
