Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
