so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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