If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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