I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
