Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
