I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
