I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
