Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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