i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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