recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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