508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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