the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
