no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
my being single is dangerous.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
