I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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