It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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