went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
