Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
