They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
