I wish you could order shots online.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
