Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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