I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
