look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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