To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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