I seem to have left my pride at pride
I wish life had little blips of pornography
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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