bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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