Plan B is the new Plan A
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
