Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
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