I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
