Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
