I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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