so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
