I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize