bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Floor bacon is actually really good
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
