he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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