Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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