Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
