he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize