32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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